I have beige garage doors. They match my beige house. The whole place is beige. I live in a small townhouse community, and the first bylaw probably has something to do with beige. Beige, the anti-color. Beige, how I love your anonymity. What I really want is to show my neighbors the secret Formula 1 car next to my wine cellar and my swimming pool that hide behind my beige garage doors.

Actually, I probably really want giant photo tarpaulins from style-your-garage.com, some nice German folks who will sell me giant billboards that Velcro to my existing beige wasteland. Prices appear to range from CDN$49.00 for a simple single door to CDN$665.00 for a jumbo jet spanning three garage doors. Some are photo-realistic, and some are more fantastical. All are pretty cool. They also sell style-your-door and, coming soon, style-your-window.

Then I could show the world the horse, the biplane, or the pole-dancing Italian supermodel that hides in my car hole. To be ironic, I could have billboards made showing a 1972 BMW Bavaria and a 1981 BMW 528i. Or, I suppose, I could just open the garage doors.

[ style-your-garage.com via telegraph.co.uk ]