From Craigslist: Tips For Selling Your Car Privately

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134808-main_FullLet’s dig into the deep and nebulous world of Craigslist for some essential (and somewhat obvious) tips for how to sell your car using free online classifieds. Kijiji users, this applies to you too.

It’s entitled: “Why Your Car Isn’t Selling — Econ 101″. Enjoy!

“It’s pretty obvious which car owners wear rose-colored sunglasses and frolic with unicorns all day. The prices you’re asking for your cars are ridiculous.

Since you haven’t felt the invisible hand of the market, allow me to deliver the pimp slap of common sense.

1) Look at Kelley Blue Book.
Start there and get an idea of what to expect for your car. If you’re asking over $10,000 for a car that tops out at $8,500 value, you are a retard. The only people who would pay that price are fellow retards, and guess what? Most of them can’t use the internet. You’re one of the lucky few. Quit while you’re ahead.

2) List some basic information about the car.
How many miles does the car have? Manual or auto? What year is it? What options does it have? Clean title or salvage? Do you have all the records? This is important, relevant information. “Prelude for sale” is not self-explanatory, dumbfuck.

3) Put up pictures.
A picture is worth a thousand words. Put up a photo and give a little taste of what the car looks like. There’s nothing I enjoy more than driving 40 miles to see the “immaculate” car with cigarette burns all over the interior. Be upfront. In fact, that’s a good one too.

4) Be upfront.
I’m about to hand you several thousands of dollars. Do you really think I won’t be thorough and check out/test drive the car? Yes, I’m going to notice that the engine shudders, or it pulls to the left, or it has a peculiar smell. Be honest about it. Don’t be a jerk.

5) Learn to read the market.
This is a recession. Your car has been up on CL at the same price for 3 months. LOWER THE PRICE!

6) Don’t use so many keywords.
I’ve searched for “BMW M3″ and gotten a Geo Storm result by some guy that doesn’t know how to use keywords properly. Those cars do not cater to the same type of person! Let it go.

7) Learn what “OBO” means.
“OBO” literally means “or best offer.” If you aren’t taking the best offer, don’t use the phrase. Simple as that.
I don’t see what’s so hard about this. You have a car and you want cash. I have cash and I want a car. Let’s make this work.”

[Craigslist]